Love & Light and everything bright...

June 27, 2011

Last updated July 26, 2011 - Another personal story on intuition and revelation

Betty, Beth-Janine and I

How I re-encountered my late first wife's soul at a recent gathering in Hawaii

FROM HAIKU, MAUI

A PERSONAL STORY - CONFIDENTIAL - DO NOT REPRODUCE

Betty, Beth-Janine and I

How I re-encountered my late first wife's soul at a recent gathering in Hawaii

INTRODUCTION

HAIKU, Maui, July 22, 2011 - What you're about to read is another personal story on intuition and revelation. Since the experience is still "raw" and unfolding "live," I ask anyone who reads these lines to please treat them as private and confidential.  The purpose of documenting what happened in the last few days is to encourage others to trust their intuition and to live their lives according to the truth they find in their hearts.  When we do that, we recognize it.  Because it FEELS right and resonates with our whole being.

* * *

BETH (Mon, Jul 18, 2011 at 7:16 PM):  I also feel the strong connection with you at the soul level ... we will get to the bottom of it ... or not.... it does not matter.  We have crossed paths before.

I have been asked by J to look into the Constantine lifetime through a reading I had through Sharon Richards recently.  I don't actually know when that will happen but will need to come through Ahtun Re or J most likely.  I wouldn't be surprised if there was something more in the messages about that since it was part of the conference and there is so much to that life.   

ALTZAR (Mon, Jul 18, 2011 at 10:53 PM):  Thank you for your note and for sharing what you knew about our Constantine connection.  If in time, you find out what it was, that would be nice. If not, that's also okay.  It doesn't matter, as you say.  We can both feel the connection now so we know that we must have been together in some type of relationship before.  

I don't know Sharon Richards.  But I do know that I don't feel an urge to know more about my past lifetimes, especially after that wrenching regression session in which the light beings told me not to worry about past incarnations.  They said that I am done and coming home after this one.  And I'd had J also confirm earlier that I am on the right track. So I just want to do as much good as I can in this lifetime, since it is the last on this planet, shining God's love to all who are open to it.

It is interesting that you would write to me tonight.  Serendipity seems to be a way of life for me.  I was actually thinking of you and Tracy today when I read a business news story that Cisco was laying off about 10,000 people, or more than 10% of its work force.  Hope that does not affect your family. My younger daughter works for AT&T back east and has a lot of business dealings with Cisco. So she clued me in today about what was going on.


ALTZAR (Tue, Jul 19, 2011 at 12:53 AM): Hi again, Beth.  I just had an amazing memory flash. And the idea seems so "out there" that it scared me.

There is not much doubt that you and I had shared past lifetimes. But what if you may have been my wife in this one?  Or at least one of your splits?  You'd probably think I am certifiably crazy.  And I would not blame you.  But consider this...  

My first wife died of brain tumor in June 1971, six months after we were married.  She was 25. I was 26.  When I first saw you in Kona, I was startled by the instant familiarity I felt. Later, I told you I had felt a deep soul connection.  As evidently have you.  And tonight, after I had sent you the first email, I was stunned by another realization.  

Beth, guess what her name was?  Betty.  

Do you have a picture of yourself when you were 24-25 that you can share with me? Here's Betty at that age:

  [Betty’s photo, Sep 1970, age 24]

I know, the odds against this intuition being true are truly great.  But there is a possibility of it if the two of you were split souls.  I don't know if there is an age limit between the splits, but anyway, thought I'd share this crazy thought with you.

BETH (Wed, Jul 20, 2011 at 6:41 AM): I had Tracy add Betty to my "page" of match/es that he has.  I just now read your email (playing catch up right now having been gone for 2 weeks and I also have company) about your first wife and your hypothesis about her having been my split.  Although I would not have picked these pictures to send you myself of myself, it was a quick way to look at a picture of me with shorter hair at about 37 years old actually, and my split, Janine, AND Betty.  



Gosh, where to start...

Well, this is something.  I had a "gasp" reaction as I read your email.  The resemblance is obvious as Betty looks like a combination of both me and Janine.  I don't feel like I look incredibly a lot like Janine as she is always so dolled up but Tracy feels we look very much alike.  Your Betty is so beautiful and I am so sorry that you had to experience this unbelievable loss at such a young age ... both of you!  Wow.  Makes me want to cry.  Makes me cry.

And because it makes me cry, I feel strongly that you are right.  I would have been 10 years old in 1971; a time when I was "an angel" in my mother's eyes.  As a teen, I was "in my power" and had no fear.  I was preparing for a very powerful life at that time which sort of went all wrong in my opinion as the "school of hard knocks" knocked me down a few notches as I aged through my 20s and 30s and 40s.  As a senior in high school, I was the Student Body President, Head Cheerleader, and I worked, and I won the "Most School Spirited" award at the end of my high school years.  I was "in my power".

I could see that if Betty was a split of mine that I was all to gain from the soul energy that she released at her death.   Janine is a year younger than me and she was beginning her career at that time basically, so I could see her having gotten some soul energy as a gift from Betty as well, assuming all this is indeed true.

Her name having been Betty is a WOW.  What is, if anything, it short for?  It's usually shortened from Elizabeth, which is my name.  

Well, Bob, you were right about Constantine.  I am feeling pretty confident that you are right again about this.  This is AMAZING to me.  Unbelievable how this has all come together.  I have not done any reading about Constantine's wives recently but I understand/remember that he was not so nice to them.  I believe he had one of them beheaded?  What came to me is Betty's death may have been karmic (I hate to say this, Bob).  It is a "knowing" that I get as my intuition.  It was also another thing that happened in this lifetime to help you remember THAT lifetime...  regardless of whether she and I were splits or not.

Heavy stuff.  I'm sorry for saying this...it's very difficult and I realize it very much.  

But, it is also becoming more clear that I may have been one of your wives in that lifetime. I will have to do some research on that.  I will try and get this confirmed by Ahtun Re or Ken, or J may even mention it in the Messages.  Who knows.  

Just incredible, Bob.  What more can I say.

ALTZAR (Wed, Jul 20, 2011 at 12:29 PM): Hi, Beth.  It is now my turn to cry.  No, it's nothing that you said.  But thinking and feeling your words had awakened some distant memories.  Another revelation struck me just now like a bolt of lightening.  Followed by tears...

Remember what I told you on what date I finally put the pieces together and concluded that I must have been Constantine?  It was June 25.  Betty died in my arms the morning of June 24, 1971. Her mother was also in the hospital room.  She had tactfully walked away and was looking out the window to give us privacy in this most intimate of intimate moments.  

At the time, I wrote a heart-rendering letter about it and shared it only with my late (much older) brother in former Yugoslavia.  He said he cried like a baby even though he had never met or seen Betty.  You are only the second person in 40 years that I am sharing this with.  Because I feel when Betty's soul left that hospital room, a part of her energy stayed with you.

This June 24 was the 40th anniversary of Betty's death.  As I do every year, I connected with her with a short prayer.  Now I realize that my Constantine revelation at that time was no coincidence, either. Betty was again here to remind me.  Which means you were also there. You - Beth-Betty-Janine - must have been my wife in the Constantine lifetime. He had several, so I don't know which one.  That is why we both felt such a deep soul connection the instant we met.  That is why you also had such a strong reaction to Constantine at around the same time (June 19, I believe you said?).  

It was the revelation about the synchronicity of above dates that brought tears to my eyes moments ago.  It was followed by a recollection of a hazy memory from Kona.

As I told you in an earlier email, I think that all four of you are gorgeous people.  You radiate beauty.

"What a beautiful family," I caught myself thinking looking at you, Bradley, Raven and Tracy upon our first meeting at the opening ceremony on July 5.  Then as I watched Bradley and Raven and Gwen climb the tree just below the stairs, I thought they all looked like little fairies.  "You look like the three Eve's looking for an Adam," I told them jokingly.

Then another hazy thought crossed my mind, which I instinctively tucked away.  It was the moment I first felt the connection and saw the resemblance between you and Betty.  "These could have been our children," was the thought I had shunned looking at Bradley and Raven.  Betty and I had talked about having four children.  Or maybe five?  My memory is hazy about that.

There is no need to apologize, my darling Beth, for saying that Betty's death may have been karmic. It was.  I felt that even before I knew what karma was.  I just didn't know why and for which lifetime(s) I was paying the price.  At first, I thought it was punishment for the way I had treated women as a young man. Except for Betty, I had been quite callous in my prior relationships... the "love them and leave them"-type of a brash young man.  Of course, I have been hurt, too.  So I have since tried to make amends to all the women I have hurt, and offered unconditional forgiveness to all the women who have hurt me.

Then I thought Betty died because of something that happened when I was in college.  In my junior year, I was in love with a young woman who evidently did not love me as much.  When she got pregnant, I was ready to marry her even though neither of us had any means of supporting ourselves at the time.  But she preferred an abortion.  I acquiesced. My elder brother arranged it.  It was the easiest solution for both of us.  

A few years later, I realized how wrong I was to go along with it. I regretted it deeply. Just before I turned 33, I resolved to live the rest of my life without regrets. The first thing I did was quit my cushy job at IBM and start my own business. That was 33 years ago.  I have been trying to stay true to that old vow ever since.

Now I realize that Betty's death was most directly related to my life as Constantine.  Indeed, he had had one of his wives executed as well as his favorite son (from another marriage) whom he was grooming as an heir apparent.  He did it because he believed that the two were having an affair. Again, lots of karma there.

To answer your question, Betty was her first name.  Her middle name was Louise.  Before we married, she was Betty Louise Hunt.  And just now (oh, my God!) another revelation came to me.  

Her father was a military attaché at the Canadian embassy in Belgrade, Yugoslavia in the mid 1950s.  So Betty and her three sisters actually lived in my hometown at the time when I was in junior high or early high school.  We never met.  But as you now know, that's also where Constantine lived and ruled for a large part of his life.

Finally, another recollection.  I apologize in advance if it also makes you cry.  Betty and I married on Dec 19, 1970, St. Nicholas Day, the saint-protector of the Djurdjevic family.  While we were still happily married newlyweds, we went to see the film "Love Story" which was released in early 1971. We both cried at its tragic ending.  Little did we know that in a few months, we'd be living it.  

So three years ago, I honored that memory with a Despacho (a shamanic offering) and this musical tribute:

Love Story - piano version - by Bob Djurdjevic (Nov 13, 2008)

Much love

Altzar

Betty's Spirit Lives On...

HAIKU, Maui, July 23, 2011 - Since the time Beth and I exchanged those messages, she has had it confirmed by our Teacher she is indeed of Betty's soul as is Janine Turner.

"Hi, Beth.  That was an amazing confirmation... So it's true. You and Betty and Janine are split souls.  I had no doubts after our email exchanges, but it's nice to have it also "officially" confirmed...  Here some additional photos of Betty for you.

It took four more days for another penny to drop.  As I was reviewing my notes from the Kona conference today (July 26), my heart jumped when I read this quote: "When a split (soul) passes away, it becomes a guide and its energy gets integrated with the living soul(s)."  Now we know not only what but HOW it is done.

So even though Betty whom I knew and loved as my young wife is gone, she is back in my life now.  Her soul lives on in Beth and Janine.  No wonder Beth and I felt an instant connection when we first met in Kona.  Nor that, when I looked at her children, I was seeing the daughters Betty and I could have had.  Contemplating this miracle of soul memory retrieval put a smile on my face.  I felt deeply grateful to the Teacher and to my other guides for making this discovery possible.

You can see above Beth and Betty at about the same age... in college.

Furthermore, I have now also intuited that Betty-Beth-Janine soul is my first wife Minervina in my Constantine lifetime.  More on that in Part III about Constantine's personal life: "Trail of Tears: From Sword to Lotus Flower"  - Constantine's 17-century long shape-shifting journey.

THE END (for now).

Love  Light

Latest 2011 |  Music | Spirituality | Prayer Request |Essays |Personal | About Altzar | Search | Contact Altzar